My Prayer Life
Hi! It has been so so long since I did one of these, and that is because life has been just so crazy, but also so great! Starting this year, you guys have seen the struggle to get myself up to college level, the self-doubt, the questioning if this is truly what the Lord wanted for me, feeling like I am starting over, and just having to take steps of faith every single day. Now that I am here, there is definitely a peace that God has given me that I haven’t had with the other things I have tried. That is not to say that I was even trying to do life against God, or without His Will, but I am very impatient as most of us are. I thought there was an easy answer for what I should do after high school and I just went for it without as much prayer as I should have.
The most uncomfortable thing, happened to be exactly what the Lord wanted for me. I swear, He just has such a different view for my life, and every time I have to make a decision the obvious answer always is not the way that God was directing. I wanted to hear from Him but yet I didn’t talk to the Lord when I had made all those decisions right after high school. I still struggle with this, and every single sermon, and personal devotions in the morning keep bringing me back to talking with the Lord.
I LOVE this verse that I recently read, I think that the Lord cares about EVERY word that he speaks.
In Matthew 6:6 it says “But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.”
I don’t go to God when I am dealing with a decisions, or when I am struggling with a situation or circumstance that I wish would just go away or change. Naturally, when I am in these situations I usually try to fill all my time with friends and book out my schedule so that I don’t have time alone because I get scared what the response would be. I get so anxious in the quiet, I have to blast music or call a friend on my long car drives to feel okay and not spiral with my thoughts.
What if those quiet times were spent talking to Him though? What if instead of instantly playing the podcast, I take time to listen to what He wants to tell me? My goal for this fall, is just to grow in my walk with God, specifically in my conversations with Him. I want it to become second nature to not allow my anxious thoughts and fears take control in those quiet times of the day, but to instantly just call out to the Lord, and speak to Him.
Ok guys, that is all that I have to talk about today. I am hoping to get more into a rhythm of posting these because I have literally missed it so much! I love the community that I have with you amazing people, and am excited to hear from you and what the Lord is doing in your life as well.
Have an amazing weekend!
Love
Bella <3
